When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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