Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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