are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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