Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
another moral hangover. fuck.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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