Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
