remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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