bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize