I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
