i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
