My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
