so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
