I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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