their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
