butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
