So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
