Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
