Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
