For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
