she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
