I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
