i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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