weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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