the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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