i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
