when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
