No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
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