So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
