Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Randomize
