like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
