Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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