Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
