your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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