I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
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