You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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