her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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