Texts From Last Night

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  (510): View more from California

  We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.

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  (510): We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP. http://tfl.nu/sbka
  Replies (14) Good night (981) Bad night (449) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.

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  (207): I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking. http://tfl.nu/3fqs
  Replies (27) Good night (3334) Bad night (875) Order T-Shirt
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  (909): View more from California

  my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks

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  (909): my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks http://tfl.nu/7ncm
  Replies (16) Good night (1051) Bad night (4085) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.

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  (404): Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption. http://tfl.nu/47c6
  Replies (24) Good night (6000) Bad night (1068) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.

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  (203): The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this. http://tfl.nu/mzic
  Replies (6) Good night (773) Bad night (4252) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...

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  (+61): She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was... http://tfl.nu/7mx1
  Replies (50) Good night (11095) Bad night (2384) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."

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  (804): The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be." http://tfl.nu/zz4e
  Replies (7) Good night (651) Bad night (2986) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.

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  (716): I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together. http://tfl.nu/l7kg
  Replies (34) Good night (3003) Bad night (9715) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context

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  (859): there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context http://tfl.nu/uw18
  Replies (4) Good night (2315) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.

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  (703): I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave. http://tfl.nu/udrq
  Replies (4) Good night (2062) Bad night (767) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.

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  (517): Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call. http://tfl.nu/hx3q
  Replies (5) Good night (643) Bad night (2840)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.

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  (778): He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him. http://tfl.nu/e3t2
  Replies (5) Good night (1633) Bad night (701) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.

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  (858): I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out. http://tfl.nu/k2ug
  Replies (7) Good night (380) Bad night (616) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....

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  (323): Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner.... http://tfl.nu/erk9
  Replies (8) Good night (1459) Bad night (559) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home

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  (951): I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home http://tfl.nu/0s5f
  Replies (3) Good night (637) Bad night (230) Order T-Shirt

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