I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize