Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
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