I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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