; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
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