problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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