do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
