rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
