Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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