I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
