he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
