just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Are we still banned from the library?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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