Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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