I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
