I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
